Rendezvous With My Master, My Soul Friend & An introduction To Mahavtaar Babaji

Dr. Uday Shah, the spiritual scientist, authority on aura research, medical gynaecologist, and my soul friend and soul warrior, as he likes to call it, and I see now exactly why.

I met him at Sai Karuna mission’s (SKM) Dwarka centre, just after receiving his second in-person attunement for advanced healing modalities taught under his guidance. During our corridor conversation, as he was on his way out, I offered to walk him to the door. He humbly accepted.

We spoke about how I share my birthday with Swami Vivekananda, my migration from Kashmir, my mother being a Sri Sri follower, and my brother being perhaps the only coronation guru amongst Kashmiris right now, and yet here I stood before him, as though I had been waiting all these years for this very union of souls.

My path was different from my predecessors and my family, and I knew it in the first instant. No questions asked. A one-way journey to NOWHERE.

Yes, that’s right. NOWHERE.

There is nowhere to go and nowhere to be. We are the awakening we have been waiting for. We are the existing. As above, so below. As microcosm, so the macrocosm. As Anu, so Parmanu. We are the ocean that mistakes itself for drops of water and stays trapped in finitism.

There is no guru-shishya parampara at SKM. After attunement, it is the individual journey, each person equally important. The belief that some guru will come for our salvation keeps us highly dependent on external help, causing us to forget that we are spiritual beings having human experiences, which means we are capable of anything.

The Beginning of My Soul Awakening

When I migrated from Kashmir in 1990, I branded it as the shaping of my independence and self-reliance, but now I know it was the beginning of my soul awakening. I was being prepared for today. Preparation for ascension began more than three decades ago in this lifetime, and God knows how many lifetimes have passed already.

One morning, I was called back from school. It was June, I believe 9^th June 1990, though I cannot be certain of the exact date. My father and two uncles had gone to Jammu to find us a shelter.

My mother was packing. My grandparents were helping. Besides me, there was my elder brother, now Guru Swami Prakash, who was nine. I was seven. One younger cousin and her mother were there too; she must have been around three. Another aunt was also present.

I learnt that our kind Muslim neighbour, the professor uncle as we used to call him, had warned us that we would be killed the following day. We had to embrace exodus immediately. Four Kashmiri Hindu families in that area had been marked as the next targets by terrorists.

We had to flee within hours.

The Truck, the Highway, and the Hero Within

One truck. Four families, perhaps three. The other family had the manpower to pack most of their belongings; we could hardly manage much. The truck pushed off around 5 or 6 pm, headed for Jammu.

Around 8 pm on the highway, it was stopped. Stillness and silence seeped into every nook and cranny of that truck’s covered back. No air circulation. No visibility. We were concealed, perhaps 13 or 14 people together.

In that moment, I decided I would save them all. I would engage the terrorists; while they put bullets in me, I would tell the driver to flee with the rest. I meant it completely.

Then a knock came: all clear. It was only the army. We could proceed.

We heaved a sigh of relief. But in my world, I was the hero. I was the saviour, and I carried that role for the rest of my life, right up until recently, when I finally released the burden I had been holding for so long. A burden that was never even mine to carry. This is ancestral karma.

Abundance in the Midst of Crisis

Emotional turmoil followed in the months and years ahead. The financial crisis that others described was something I never truly felt. I only experienced abundance and gratitude. I know that’s difficult to comprehend, so allow me to explain.

I would walk to school for days and save perhaps ₹10, or win prize money from a debate competition. When my cousins visited, when a friend needed help, or when my family needed money, I would give it all away, not once thinking about where the next rupee would come from.

And it always replenished. The next competition, a few more days of walks in the sun, which I loved by the way, and I always had money to spend. My parents cut back on luxuries to focus on daily meals and education, yet I would sometimes give money to my uncle’s family too, should they face a crunch.

Funny how I now understand that the abundance I experienced existed because there was no doership involved. I held the money, but the money was not mine. It flowed through me. All that mattered was that an expense arose in a certain moment, I had the means to meet it, and I did not hesitate. This is the universal law of abundance.

The Matrix We Have Created

Look around. God did not make us slog for oxygen, water, sunlight, food, or the space available to us. Our cells know precisely when and what to divide into. We are not even consciously participating in our own physical growth; it is happening on its own. Blood circulating, 50,000 to 60,000 cells dying every day so that new ones can be produced. We have no role to play.

We simply need to be. We have nowhere to be. Just be.

God set no targets for us. We keep setting new ones and then chasing them relentlessly. It is almost as if we have created a false matrix of needs and wants, and an artificial demand and supply of illusion follows. It is on us to break this, by doing nothing. Just be.

Who Is This “I”?

I work at an MNC now. I earn decently. I have two children, brilliant souls, I must say. My husband works for one of the largest consulting companies in the world. And yet I told Dr. Shah: none of this matters. I know. I found what I had come for. He smiled, and I was later told he called me his Jammu girl within his close circle.

I was once a state karate champion. Not long ago, I ran and won marathons and long-distance races. I have built businesses from scratch with God’s grace, and I am told I am an exceptional parent.

But who is this “I”?

What am I beyond the roles and responsibilities, beyond my achievements, my dual master’s degrees, my job title, and my annual income? If, like the Kashmir incident, everything were stripped away again, what would remain?

Answer: Existence. Abundance. Infinity arising out of Shoonya.

I am the awareness experiencing all of the above. I no longer identify with any of it. I have nothing to lose, so nothing can be taken. There is no “I”, there is only experience. Even when we say I experience, there is duality: an experiencer and the experienced. Let there be only existence, only the ocean in which all drops arise and fall.

The Coming Storm

When AI takes away jobs from the masses, identities will be stripped away. We have held our identities, achievements, traumas, religions, beliefs, castes, and socioeconomic statuses too close. When the matrix falls, people will face two choices:

Fall to the lowest lows of depression, searching for an identity that never truly existed. It was always only in the mind.

Rise to the highest highs and ask: Who am I? Who am I minus all of the above, minus my false identity? This will open the door to spiritual ascension and true soul purpose. Why did we choose to incarnate at this exact moment in time?

Wait for Chapter 2…